Boys imitate what they see. If what they see is emotional distance, guardedness, and coldness between men they will grow up to imitate that behavior…What do boys learn when they do not see men with close friendships, where there are no visible models of intimacy in a man’s life beyond his spouse?
- Kindlon and Thompson, Raising Cain
"The poses, facial expressions, and body language of the men below will strike the modern viewer as very gay indeed. But it is crucial to understand that you cannot view these photographs through the prism of our modern culture and current conception of homosexuality. The term ‘homosexuality’ was in fact not coined until 1869, and before that time, the strict dichotomy between ‘gay’ and ‘straight’ did not yet exist. Attraction to, and sexual activity with other men was thought of as something you did, not something you were. It was a behavior — accepted by some cultures and considered sinful by others. […]
“Whether the men below were gay in the way our current culture understands that idea, or in the way that they themselves understood it, is unknowable. What we do know is that the men would not have thought their poses and body language had anything at all to do with that question. What you see in the photographs was common, not rare; the photos are not about sexuality, but intimacy.”
Source: Bosom Buddies: A Photo History of Male Affection, by Brett & Kate McKay
Chandler Bing, you smooth son of a bitch.
"i’m so proud of you," i whisper as my favorite character undergoes well written character development